Falling in love...what does that really mean? Does that mean that you give up who you are and what you are in order to please the person you are "in love" with? Does the piece of the puzzle really fit? Is he or she the Ying to your Yang? Does it mean that you stay in a relationship just because of the children and disregard anything else you may feel? Is it being unhappy in a relationship? Is it giving up your dreams to live someone else's dreams? I am not expert but what I am about to say is based solely on experiences I have witnessed and my own personal experience. This may or may not resonate with you with it was on my mind so I thought I would write about it.
I have seen so many of these throughout the years from family, friends and let's not forget about myself. Speaking from a girls perspective, we grow up thinking of that fairytale love. The one where you wait for your prince charming to come rescue you, sweep you off your feet and take you away to that magical place. Where there is no arguing, no troubles, just you two living the happily ever after. No one tells us that there are children, family, money, house, work, cheating, lying, just to name a few of the bad. Not everything is bad in a relationship, don't get me wrong. There were more great times than bad, it's just the bad left the marks within my heart that makes it hard for me to love or trust, mostly trust.
Funny thing, last night during one of my TikTok live videos I asked the question, "why do we not trust in relationships?" The answer that was most popular was that everyone had been hurt by someone that they trusted with their heart. This goes into all aspects, friends, lovers, significant others, etc. When someone you trusted whole hearted with your heart and they turn around and shatter it, it's very hard to come back. Now you can come back from it. You have to allow yourself to let go of that pain, let go of the past and move forward. Not everyone out there is going to make the same mistakes. Don't get me wrong you might get hurt once or twice but that will make you that much stronger. Our hurt and pain is what makes us grow as people. I have learned that hurt is what pushed me to make me better and achieve my goals. I use that fire to burn my engine and strive to be that much stronger. I am human so there are times where I want to throw the white flag up and say I give up but, that is NOT an option. Giving up is never an option. That is when you must fight the hardest.
Loving yourself first plays a huge role in this. If you don't learn to love yourself, put yourself first, how can you allow someone to come in and love you the way you deserve? I ask this question all the time to myself when I am feeling down in the dumps, going down that rabbit hole that only gets deeper the more I think of the what ifs and forget that I am number one. We tend to forget that a lot. We really do and that's what we really need to work on. Loving yourself is what helps us get through the tough times and helps us in the good times. It helps us see our worth and who we truly are.
Loving ourselves is one of the most important things to do in order to move on from any pain or passed experiences. Loving yourself more is the key to achieving the strength you need to make anything your heart desires come to life. You are the only one that can make that happen. It shouldn't depend on anyone but yourself. No one else is in charge of your happiness or your self love. I have used this blog to help myself love me more with the intention to help others see how amazing and beautiful they truly are. You are amazing as you are and don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise or make you feel like you don't matter. Time will also heal all wounds and with time you will see how amazing it will feel to love yourself and see yourself through your own eyes.
Remember love yourself, love yourself more, it's up to you!~~~Janet~~~
You are the piece to the puzzle of success and self love.